5 Most Annoying Baby Toys

Sometimes toys seem like a good idea until you bring them home and they actually get used. Sure, there are annoying toys that my daughter plays with now, but when she was a baby, there were a few toys that always made me want to take a sledgehammer to them. I couldn't wait for her to outgrow them.

Let this be a PSA to you: don't buy these toys! Your sanity is on the line!

1. Anything that says “surface washable only”

Are you kidding me with this? Your kid will spend ALL DAY with this toy in her MOUTH, and you can't throw it in the washing machine to properly de-germ it. No thank you.

I had a whole bin of these types of toys that I kept meaning to “surface wash”. But I really didn't have time to do that. Which is more important: loading and unloading the dishwasher to run it AGAIN to clean another round of bottles or stand at the sink wiping off a plush lovey? The bottles win every time. That bin of surface-wash toys will end up in a trash receptacle, and if you throw them out now, your baby will never know.

2. VTech Musical Mouse Teether

This little guy looks cute. It's a mouse holding a piece of cheese that's the teether. But then you turn it on.

First, it's SO LOUD. And there's no volume control! (Honorable mention on this list goes to baby toys without volume control! ANNOYING.) So, your 3-month-old is going to have a mouse shouting songs in her face whenever she chews on it. Mine never chewed on it, by the way. She just wanted to press its stupid button and make it sing its stupid loud songs ALL THE TIME. I mean, I know I'm not the target audience for baby toy music, but I still have to listen to it!

(Word of advice: VTech baby toys have some of the WORST songs. Sometimes they don't even rhyme! It's just nonsense!)

3. Parents Magazine MyPod MP3 Children's Songs Music Player

This musical toy does have volume control, thank goodness. And maybe it wouldn't have been so annoying to me if my daughter didn't constantly play with it AND if the songs had been sung right! I mean, who ends the ABCs with “Now you've heard my ABCs. Tell me what you think of me”? WHAT? That's just weird.

Luckily, this is not a toy on the market anymore. Unfortunately for me, we still own it and my daughter still plays with it.

4. Fisher-Price BeatBowWow

I brought this one home after reviewing it at work. The music felt like “baby in the club” music as opposed to the traditional baby toy music, and I figured that I could handle listening to it at home.

Well, then it became my daughter's favorite toy for about three months straight. She pressed the button to make BeatBowWow dance and sing over and over and over again. Do NOT buy this toy unless you think you'd still be able to fall asleep at night with the lyrics “Paws to the left! Paws to the right! 1,2,3! Wiggle down just right!” stuck in your head.

5. Melissa & Doug Sound Puzzle Musical Instruments
This isn't technically a baby toy, but my daughter did receive it for Christmas when she was 18 months old. It's a great concept, but there is no on/off switch. If you don't want it to randomly start playing music in the middle of the night, then you have to take out the batteries. And then reinsert the batteries when your kid wants to play with it (which will be all of two seconds - not worth the effort!).

I know that the sounds playing has nothing to do with the puzzle being possessed (the possessed toy award goes to our VTech activity table) and that it's all to do with how light hits the sensors on the puzzle, but it's still annoying. Now even when my daughter hears the puzzle go off, she says, "Oh that puzzle."

Those are the baby toys that really got on my nerves. What toys does your baby play with that you want to throw out the window and never see or hear again?