The other day at the grocery store a kindly older woman walked up to my daughter and me as we were waiting for our number to be called at the deli counter."You have beautiful eyes," the woman said to my daughter. "Give me a smile!"
My daughter did not smile, and the woman continued asking for one. Eventually, she gave up and left us alone, but it really got me thinking. I did nothing to encourage my daughter to smile for this stranger, and why should I or why should she? The woman was a STRANGER. Aren't we supposed to be teaching our kids to NOT talk/smile/whatever to/for strangers?
My kid is not a trained monkey, and I want her to know it. I made sure to tell her as soon as the woman was out of earshot that she didn't have to smile for anyone if she didn't want to. She didn't have to do anything for anyone that she didn't want to. (Cleaning up her toys for me is the exception.) That extends beyond smiling to hugging, talking, etc.
Perhaps it's that I STILL hear these same things as an adult. Today's "smile for me" from a grandmotherly type turns into a "smile for me" from some rando guy on the sidewalk 20 years later.
What do you guys think about certain attentions paid to your children from strangers? How do you handle it when someone you don't know commands your child to do something?
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